Movie of the week GI Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Action. With CHANNING TATUM, Christopher Eccleston and Sienna Miller. Director: Stephen Sommers. 13M. Opens 14 August.
Rating: 2/5
Reviewer:


WHAT’S IT ABOUT?
The GI Joe team has special powers and uses modern technology to rescue Earth from horrible electrical insects that want to eat the planet. But will it be in time?

WHO WILL ENJOY IT?
Young dudes who can’t get enough of over-the-top funpark rides will love it. This devil-may-care windbag of a movie is just special effects, chase scenes and earth-shaking action held together with a comic book story. At least it’s better than the wretched Transformers sequel - it has some humanity and Channing Tatum, who made such an impression in Fighting, gives a sympathetic, believable portrayal of the main character. He’s more sensitive than the average action hero and this saves the flick. But it’s still arrogant, noisy, predictable and without a decent plot.

WAIT FOR DVD?
No. In fact after you’ve seen it on the big screen you need to see it in an Imax theatre with a giant screen and an overwhelming sound system to fully appreciate the sight of the Eiffel Tower collapsing and horrifying electrical insects gobbling up a city. Not even your plasma screen could do justice to the devastating action scenes. Definitely not for people who prefer sophisticated movies but action junkies will get their money’s worth. And the girls with their glossy red lips are supersexy.

POPCORN FACTS
- South African-born actor Arnold Vosloo makes a cameo appearance.

- Tatum Channing was chosen to play Duke over Mark Wahlberg and Sam Worthington.

Jordin sparkles on her second album

Judging by the way the first single off Battlefield is soaring up local and international charts it’s safe to say Jordin Sparks has created another must-have CD.

The album is about strength in life, love and staying true to yourself, the award-winning singer says. “There’s a lot more growth so my voice sounds a little bit more mature. I wanted to pick songs that I relate to and that I wouldn’t mind singing for the rest of my life. There are four songs I wrote and I’m really, really excited about.”

The 19-year-old songbird recorded the album between January and June and was backed by heavyweight producers T-Pain and OneRepublic frontman Ryan Tedder, who penned Leona Lewis’ hit single Bleeding Love and Beyoncé’s Halo.

The 12-track album features two bonus tracks - Tattoo and One Step at a Time - from her 2007 self-titled first album.

On the track S.O.S. (Let the Music Play) Jordin tries an upbeat sound but says she’s “still just the ballad-singer girl from American Idol.

“I don’t talk about things I don’t know. Sex, drugs, rock ’n roll - I don’t know about any of those things. I just talk about things that are kind of universal - love, friendship, things like that. I think the world needs to hear some of that.”

We’re sure the Sparkplugs (her official fanbase) will agree!

Sizzling Ciara

She’s one of the hottest R&B singers around and is wooing fans with her latest chart-topper, Love Sex Magic, featuring Justin Timberlake. If you haven’t heard her latest album, Fantasy Ride, what are you waiting for? Here’s more on divine Ciara.

- Her father was in the US army so Ciara grew up on army bases around the world. Her family eventually settled in New York when she was eight.

- Her music career was inspired by seeing Destiny’s Child perform on TV. “My ultimate goal is to be one of the best female entertainers ever, like those I watched growing up,” she says.

- She won a Grammy for Best Short Form Music Video with Missy Elliott for Lose Control in 2006.

- Ciara took the part of a high school volleyball star in 2005’s All You’ve Got. Next she appears in Mama, I Want to Sing, playing a preacher’s daughter who becomes a pop star. “I want to be an amazing actress,” Ciara says. “I’m looking forward to many more film experiences.”

- Fantasy Ride is a personal story. “I’m taking my fans on a virtual fantasy ride through music and my life. Look at the first two singles. They’re both extensions of who I am and yet so different. Never Ever is warm and Love Sex Magic is aggressive. Both are sides of me and there’s so much more to share. It’s all a part of the Fantasy Ride.”

- The busy singer/actress owns a talent agency called Universal Dance Talent, which establishes careers for up-and-coming dancers. “The ultimate goal is to have a dance school with a studio,” she says. Plus rumour has it she’s set to release a clothing line soon. We can’t wait!

- She thinks guys are intimidated by her height! At 1,9 m tall this isn’t a gal who has to look up to dates. “Some guys are nervous speaking to me. Maybe it’s because I’m so tall! Since I’ve been doing music I don’t really get asked out much,” she says.

WIN!
Tell us who your fave artist is and you could win one of 10 Fantasy Ride albums, courtesy of Sony BMG SA. SMS Ciara along with your comments, name and address to 34923 by 5 pm on 20 August. Each SMS costs R2.

CD of the month: Fierce!

FIERCE! by various artists
Rating: 3/5
Reviewer: Lara Atson
An album for all the rockers out there! This new compilation from Sony Music is sure to get any party going. The CD features radio-friendly rock/pop hits from bands such as Good Charlotte, Metro Station and The Ting Tings. Highlights include Pink’s Sober and Breakeven from The Script. And you can look good while jamming to your favourite tune. They’ve thrown in a 20 per cent Rage discount clothing voucher in every copy and a free NKD Step Right Up ringtone.

CRADLESONG by Rob Thomas
Rating: 4/5
Reviewer: Jared Orlin
Rob, lead singer of rock band Matchbox 20, has another winner with his second solo album, the follow-up to Something To Be (2005). His voice is flawless as are his melodies and deep, thought-provoking lyrics, particularly on the first single, Her Diamonds. Gasoline and Give Me the Meltdown are radio-friendly, proving Rob is no one-hit wonder.

TENDER MOMENTS by Tender
Rating: 4/5
Reviewer: Mma-Tshepo Mokgoko
Tender Mavundla, a finalist in the fourth season of South African Idols, delivers pure enjoyment on her debut album. It’s an eclectic mix of songs with R&B and Afro-soul undertones. There are few English songs but it doesn’t matter. Most tracks are catchy and easy on the ear with Ithemba Lami, Amathatha and Nomthandazo the hottest tracks.

SOME PEOPLE HAVE REAL PROBLEMS by Sia
Rating: 4/5
Reviewer: Jared Orlin
Although this Aussie singer isn’t well known in SA she’s one to watch. She sounds like a cross between Tori Amos, Björk and Nelly Furtado - and her pop styling has intelligent, meaningful lyrics. Best songs on this, her third, album? Too many to choose from but we recommend Academia, Buttons and I Go to Sleep.

WIN!
Five readers will each win a copy of Rob Thomas’ Cradlesong. SMS the word CRADLE, your name and address to 34923 by 5 pm on 20 August 2009. Each SMS costs R2.

DVD of the week: Milk

Real-life drama. 2009. 122 min. With Sean Penn, Emile Hirsch and Josh Brolin. Director: Gus van Sant. 13 LSV.
Rating: 5/5
Reviewer: Murphy Malone

Seldom has an Oscar been as richly deserved as Sean Penn’s for his portrayal of gay-rights activist Harvey Milk whose quest to give hope and dignity to one of the most victimised communities in America cost him his life.

The movie opens with the announcement of Milk’s assassination in 1978. A tape recording, made nine days before his death, weaves an eerie thread through the story.

In flashback Milk moves from New York to what he hopes is a more open society in San Francisco. It is but not for gays who are routinely victimised. Intending to be an instrument of change he runs for political office and at first is defeated by prejudice. He finally wins and uses his position to fight anti-gay legislation; he also attracts his fair share of enemies.

This superbly crafted movie, which captures the turbulent fight for gay rights and the mood of San Francisco at the time, is highly recommended. Special features: three doccies on the struggle for gay rights in the 1970s.

PAUL BLART: MALL COP
Comedy. 2008. 87 min. With Kevin James, Keir O’Donnell and Jayma Mays. Director: Steve Carr. PGV.
Rating: 3/5
Reviewer: Willem Moller

Overweight Paul Blart (James) would love to be a real cop but with his dodgy blood sugar levels the only job he can get is as a mall security guard. He takes his job seriously though and loves zipping around on his stand-up scooter, pulling over reckless motorised-wheelchair drivers. When the mall is taken over by ruthless gangsters Paul gets a chance to prove himself and find his inner hero.

Despite some funny moments this is a pretty average comedy. What makes it worth seeing is the spectacular stunts, performed by extreme sportsmen. Check out the bonus featurettes of them filming their gravity-defying skateboard and BMX tricks.

A handy guide to rent the best DVDs

If you find it hard to decide which DVDs to take out Pick of the Movies is just the thing for you. This pocket-size quarterly publication lists the best recently released films, giving information such as genre, cast, plot overview, critics’ and viewers’ comments, awards and nominations, reasons to see it, age restriction, time and more. It costs R24,95 and is available at selected DVD rental outlets and book stores, or go to pickofthemovies.com.

WIN
To be in line to win one of 15 copies of Pick of the Movies’ winter 2009 issue, SMS the keyword MOVIES, your name and street address to 34923 by 5 pm on 20 August 2009. Each SMS costs R2.

Five minutes with Gareth Cliff

Gareth Cliff is the driving force behind the hilarious and energetic morning team at 5FM. We spent time with the guy behind the mike to find out what makes him tick.

- What makes me get out of bed in the morning: the fact I have a radio show to start at 6 am - and I often wake up late in a panic.

- The best thing about working in the radio industry: the listeners and callers. It’s a big dysfunctional family.

- My biggest dream: to be emperor of the world.

- My favourite pastimes: sleeping, being with family and friends, historical architecture, genealogy and tequila.

- Being in love means: being tricked by chemicals into believing that procreating with one other person is your decision when it’s actually the work of your DNA trying to control you to replicate itself.

- The 2010 Fifa World Cup makes me feel: I cannot wait! I’m a MASSIVE soccer fan and I’m convinced we’ll host the tournament with aplomb.

- I just can’t do without: a car. I know this because someone drove into me the other day and not having a car is an impossible situation - I drive a lot.

- Music I can live without: I’m not wise enough to appreciate jazz yet.

- My most embarrassing moment: embarrassing things happen to me all the time. I don’t really care to remember the individual events any more.

- I drive: a rental car for the moment. Argh!

- If I were president for one day: I would sterilise stupid people.